just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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