don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
