If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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