called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize