is your mom at the bar?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
my liver is dry heaving
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Randomize