So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
True strength comes from lack of pants
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
