Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
