new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
