Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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