I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize