she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Why is your signature on my underwear?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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