normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
