elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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