we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
