What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
