You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
