plz talk dirty to me
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
