But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
my poor anus
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
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