ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Randomize
