Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
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