how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
