Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
