i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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