Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
is it fun? or sober?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize