We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
