If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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