So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
