do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
