He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
