my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize