North Korea, Best Korea!
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize