Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
