Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Please, let me fuck your mom
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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