There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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