You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
