you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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