so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
