i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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