grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
