I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
