Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
