On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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