you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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