He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
