garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
