As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I see more hoeing in ur future
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize