I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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