I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize