Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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