would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
